It's been 12 years of hard work and 7 years of blogging. Seven years! I plan to pick up the blogging again, elsewhere; at least the personal stuff. Yeah, yeah, the Microsoft stuff stays here. And hopefully this blog will remain online; it's been a labor of love. Sorry I won't be able to moderate comments much after mid-day tomorrow. Be excellent to each other.  

I'll try to have my personal blog up in the next few weeks. I'f you would like me to send the link to you, please connect with me on LinkedIn (just use heatherhamilton91@marshall.usc.edu as the email address you know me from...my profile will recognize it as me...or something) and then shoot me a message there. I'll leave you with part of the email I sent out to some of my favorite people at Microsoft:

After 12 years at Microsoft, I’m turning my badge in. Which is unfortunate. Because that badge picture is *awesome*. In 1999, I had no idea I was joining a company that would keep me challenged every day. And it’s been over a decade of awesomesauce. I’ve never taken more than two weeks off at a time…and I think I’ve only done that twice. So I am really excited to be able to step away. Full stop.

You are the people that have made my experience full of fun. And so I thought that instead of a dramatic email, I’d tell you what my immediate plans involve:

1)      Naps. Lots of them. The kind where you wake up and wonder where your husband is and then you realize that you are totally not married.

2)      Cocktails at lunch. The number of cocktails is unclear. I’ll have to let you know.

3)      Trapeze. No, I’m not joining the circus. I checked with them and they won’t have me. I’ll be trying to change their minds. Who doesn’t love the smell of sweat and elephants? No, seriously. Who? Or whom?

4)      Motorcycle riding. Man, my mid-life crisis just got good. If you see me on the road, I recommend you give me a wide berth.  I’ll be the one on the Yamaha wearing lip gloss.

5)      Writing. Oh how I miss it. I may try to pry a book out of my puny brain. It’s been rattling around in there. It’s not fun to rattle. It makes dating very difficult.

6)      Oversharing.

7)      Labeling EVERYTHING. Did you know that those labels are waterproof?

8)      Updating Facebook on what I had for lunch. Posting pictures of kitties. Mocking celebrities. Ticking off my family.

9)      Blogging…with swear words.

10)   Wordament word-offs. Dance-central dance-offs. Taco trucks.

Welp, this is it blog-friends. I am not exaggerating to say that it has truly been my pleasure and I'm thankful that you gifted me with your attention.

Hamilton out!

So creative analytics (which can sometimes lead to financial bail-outs...just sayin), I believe, result from use of both sides of the brain (not a super-charged, artsy-fartsy left brain). So all you lefties out there don't have to worry that the rest of us think you aren't creative and vice versa to all my fellow right brain dominant peeps. And I have some analytical chops as well (though I will tell you that seeing trends in data and telling a story about it IS actually right brained, but I digress). Which is a good thing because...

who has a job that doesn't require both? Not having that would be boring, for sure. Having said that, there are parts of my job that I have to really try harder at. At which I really have to try harder. You know. And nobody is going to give you an MRI and craft the perfect job. This past year, there was a part of my job that I found a lot more challenging and sometimes challenging is a good thing and sometimes challenging is not as awesome as a good thing but you have to get through it. There's a reason why they call it a j-o-b. And my approach is to figure out how to balance out that part with the creative; insert some creativity into that work, sprinkle some of the art in with the science. And because I did that, I am now an even bigger,  more annoying know-it-all than I was before. So there's the payoff. Seriously, I learned things I never would have known and the related skills/knowledge now actually frees up more time for the creative stuff. So now I get to focus more time on the kind of work that feeds my spirit. I kind of want to punch myself in the face for using a term like that but it is what it is. And I kind of want to punch my face for saying that too.

I'm not sure why this is, but having the creative stuff play a bigger part in my job right now really opens the flood gates for blogging as well. Like that part of my brain gets fired up. So yay for that.

OK, also from the article, I don't agree that a manager with a busy team, who is not busy him/herself isa good manager. Sometimes it means they are dropping the ball, passing the buck. Face-punch, face-punch. I'm a little more comfortable with the style where, as long as everyone is working hard on the right things, we are all in it together. Manager included. I'm not currently managing people though, so everyone is on their own. Oh, I kid.

Anyway, more importantly, I don't necessarily think that someone would need to write down Todd's rules for managing creatives or fostering a productive work environment; it really depends on so many things. The point (well definitely mine, at least) is that companies need to think about a few things:

• assess the role of creativity in the work that needs to be done (again, not which jobs are creative and which aren't, but where creativity fits into each job)
• figure out how to establish a culture that values creativity; how to actively value it, not just pay lip-service to the idea. This is the hard part, kids.
• understand how to hire people that can show results in all areas of the job that needs to be done (or capacity for growth in some of them). There are plenty of good reasons for it, but the political posturing that results from lack of clarity around the deliverables for creative work as well as the difficulty in measuring it can lead to a lot of things that can really drain the morale of a team, especially creative individuals. OK, now go back up to the first bullet point and do this again.

It's hard to read that article and not think about your own mental capacity, right? I started to question for a second if I am right brained after all (OK, not too seriously, as I don't necessarily assign authority to others easily). And it's not about which is better but about the fact that I felt I had a good handle on who I am and what I am good at and thinking otherwise felt a little threatening (oh, my poor ego...gotta loosen the grip of attachment on my concept of who I am...lighten up Heather!). The whole personalized office thing threw me off. I used to personalize mine, but now I can't be bothered to unpack. Hey, I'm going through a minimalist phase and I work all over the place, not just in the office. And so another thing I want to point out, you know because I have to represent, is that "creative" looks different for different people. I always thought about what "creative" job I should have. But my stuff takes place in the inside of my brain, not on a canvas. And I think that this is something that can be confusing for people too. It's hard to look at a piece of work and point to the creative part if you have a preconception about what creative looks like. People sometimes put it in too small of a box. Creative is artsy and everything else is analytical. Um, no.

Anyway, my ego is recovered. Some good points in the article/blog post thing. Lotsa stuff to think about relative to creating the kind of work environment that results in abundant creativity.

(FastCompany: Women Are 85% Of The Consumer Market. But How Do You Reach Them?)

The article is interesting, but a little condescending. I am sure it's unintentional and I should point out that the fact that it's written by a woman is beside the point. I am not a bra-burning activist, but I know when something stirs inside me. Yeah, like a wild animal. Ugh. But I loves me some FastCompany. So all is forgiven, as usual. Gawd, I'm dysfunctional.

I like the concept of "transparent design". I'm not a fan of pink and fluffy and dammit if that isn't the route many designers go to create a "female" version of a product; where the male version is generally sleek and utilitarian. When do I get sleek and utilitarian? I do find that I sometimes go the "male product" route. My shoe wardrobe includes ten (yes, ten) pair of Converse Chuck Taylors. I pair them with something more feminine on top because there is no idea that appeals less than looking like a picture in a catalog.

What also caught my attention in this article is the picture because...I just made an offer on a motorcycle. Yep, sure did. I have wanted one forever and soaring gas prices and a commute that was just made more compicated by the looming spectre of bridge tolls got me thinking about something a little...sleeker and utilitarian. Rut-roh.

And just so you don't create a gritty picture of H2 in your head, I am also thinking that the pigtails are the solution to my helmet-head dilemma (and let's hear it for the curly-haired girls). And that helmet visors are made to keep bugs out of your lipgloss.

(Read about it at FastCompany)

There's something beautiful about this; more refined than video, in kind of an emotional way. I think it's that the isolation of the movement is compelling; kind of tells a story. I rarely want to crawl inside a video. This photo makes me want a nice glass of red. Or to dash out after dinner to catch a cab because I have someone important I need to see.

Coincidentally, I am currently producing training videos (nothing with any cinematographical significance...lots of screen shots and the sound of my own voice) and I am shopping for more art work for my loft (a frustrating experence to say the least, as it's been pointed out that I am rarely ever finally satisfied). So I guess that these beautiful images fall somewhere in between.

Also, the article that brought me to these photos (are they "photos" or something else?) showed the use of this technique to document the process for making strawberry beer. And the photos include pretty people. But strawberry beer is a crime against strawberries. And beer. Anyway.

.

(More info on FastCompany here)

I love novelty, when it doesn't interfere with practicality. What can I say...I am a practical gal. I think novelty and practicality can exist in harmony though. So here's what you need to think about to rock this thing.

Your resume generally gets viewed in one of 2 formats:

1) The .doc version (.docx) you sent it in (or .pdf...whatever)

2) The scanned version in a company resume database (.txt)

Resume databases cannot scan this.  To scan most effectively, a document needs to be all text and read left to right. Boring, I know...I didn't invent it. Boring, boring, boring, but true.

I'm  not saying that you shouldn't use this. I recommend linking to this from your resume. For the link, use text that would appear in your resume anyway, so it doesn't look out of place in a .txt version. Or you can send it along as an additional attachment in an email. Warning: you risk the recipient not opening it in that case. As a (former) recruiter, I would generally look for the attachment that looks like a resume and open it; at that point I decide if I want to know more and maybe...maybe...open those other attachments. So yeah, think about that.

Also, I could live a perfectly happy life without ever hearing or seeing the word "punked" again, thanks.

If I had selected my major way back in the olden days (and let's not pretend that I got to do too much selecting on account of not having a penny to my name and my scholarships only covering about 2/3 of my tuition), I likely would have chosen English. Now I look back and wished I had studied psychology. How would I have known what topic would capture my interest with such intensity? Not an hour ago I told a co-worker: "technically, it's not paranoia, it's OCD". And after one too many people telling me they were "depressed" after a bad day, I started recommending that they go to the doctor for a diagnosis, because that ain't depression, honey. Yeah, so go the doctor or zip it. One or the other. I'm that well-informed, easily annoyed person. Nice to meet you.

Anyway, I can tell you for certain that I would not have selected a STEM major. Yeah, I am 100% sure. Even if someone told me that a lack of graduates would lead to cash-money and people fighting over you. Fun! I hear people talking about exposing kids to technology early in life; other things too. And I believe that it's part of the answer to how we close the STEM graduation gaps. But definitely not enough. Our linear western culture has an expectation of someone getting from one place to another by way of a very direct path. I think we have it wrong. Under what circumstances is it beneficial for a company to hire a smart individual who doesn't come with the cookie-cutter, obvious-fit resume?  Where maybe speed to hire > (training costs +uncertainty of hiring someone not "proven" in a specific role/field)? Hard to believe I don't have a math degree, huh?

Who wants to net present value that out? It's OK, I have had more than my fair share of NPVing lately. It wouldn't be a challenge. You go ahead.

I love some of the ideas/intent behind this. Shake things up, lose the professional interviews. But. And this is the big but (not jokes, it's "but"...one "t" folks), OK, yeah, all kinds of red flags are hoisted above the good ship Method.

They are swapping out the "professional interviewers" for "professional presenters"; who were basically given an open book test. Which group do you think has the higher potential for being full of it?  Fun? Yeah. Amusing. And something that could also be uncovered more appropriately in an interview. You know, where people might not feel so humiliated if they don't get the job.

OK, second. Homework means work. Like it's right there in the word. Give them a real business issue and you are asking them to do work. But they don't "work" for you yet. It's a tenuous legal issue. I'm just saying that I wouldn't go there. The person feels that you used their recommendation in your business and you have a problem. It might be something that was already in the works when they presented it. Them just thinking you used it can tie up your legal team. It hasn't happen to me but it's scary.

And...I don't give a rip if I want to sit next to someone on a 5 hour plane ride. I want them to do the job and not tick people off. I have ear phones. Noise canceling ones. All the charm and stuff? Hey, it's fun. But so not a requirement of the job (unless it's a requirement of the job, in which case, it's called "collaboration", not "being entertaining at 30,000 feet). Reduce their expense account and send them back to coach. Change your seat at the last minute. Or your flight. Or whatever. Jeez, seriously? This is an issue that drives the interview process? Yikes.

So I got 2 more things to say about this:

1) I am starting to worry that I now officially fall into the corporate wonk bucket; where saying "no" to innovative stuff is part of what I do. But in my defense, this interview process is crazypants. Donde esta the Method PR or legal teams. OMG, did I just type that?

2) Why don't people just interview folks for the job?  Stop being cute and tooting your millenial horn. Put on your big boy pants (or big girl pants, if we can't talk in generalities) and run your business like a business. I get it...corporate culture, etc. It's stuff that should be assessed via targeted questions related to the qualifications necessary for the job, not via the show the candidates are asked to put on.

Seriously, everything does not have to play out like American Idol.

There are a few people that indulge me when it comes to these kinds of conversations. The kind where they are wrong and I am right. Oops. I mean, the ones where I learn and defend; I'm open to changing my mind. Except about the Hasselhoff/Germany thing. I will always think that is weird.

Nick Corcodillos is one of those people. His opinions are frequently head-scratchers for me. And I like it. He writes things that I never would have thought of and while I think through his "argument", it helps me work through mine. I always learn something. So...if i may submit to the court...

Advice for the Long-Term Unemployed

Oh boy. I'm gonna try to not be a butt about this. But here is the thing. Well, things. First, I am in recruiting, so I know how recruiters think/work. I know how hiring managers think/work. Second, I graduated from a top enterpreneur program. Excuse me for a second while I get a good chuckle out of the ads that were served up when I searched the rankings. For products of the little blue pill variety. It's not irony, it's just, like.yeah, I get it. And i kind of  hate myself for referring to my program that way. I recall a ranty blog post about people making those kinds of references. Anyway,  my point being that I was taught by some of the besty-bests.I have looked at a bajillion resumes and I have written a business plan. So. Here is the thing. Writing a business plan as a tactic for getting a job is crazypants.I am just here to be the truth-teller. Don't wear the crazypants, friends. I'll break it down:

1) Entrepreneurship 101: You start with the concept. See an opportunity for a product or service and then take advantage of it. But sitting around thinking "what kind of business can I start?' is silly. Yeah. So people that are entrepreneurially  (so not a word) inclined might enter a program; and for sure they are keeping their eyes open for that opportunity. But what they don't do is say "Hey, I think I will write a business plan, to get a job" and unless you have that start-up fire, the business plan will be bleh.

2) Writing a business plan is a huge amount of work. Huge. So for the job seeker, investing that much time in an activity like this that is a super-long-shot probably isn't wise. Especially when there are so many other activities that have a higher chance of working.

3) In most situations, you aren't going to get the hiring manager's attention in the first place. Most folks don't spend time reading random unsolicited business plans. The stuff that actually gets to potential investors is the good stuff, written by someone serious about starting something. You're either in or your out. And if i was starting a new business, and someone offered me a job, I'd be all "thanks but I got this thing here I want to do so why don't you just give me some money?" and then I would be all "hmm, self, can *I* fund this because this guy wants a piece of the pie and did you see my awesome idea? I want the pie....I want it all." 

So, I don't know, the business plan thing in the context of looking for a job just makes me uncomfortable. Just because it worked for someone once, doesn't mean it's good advice. I don't want to be a dream squasher.  So, I'll toss a few things out there. Because, in my opinion, most people (not you of course) really don't know how to effectively look for a new job. I know it's easy for me to say sitting over here. But my point is that there is usually more you can do; stuff you haven't thought of. And I'll be the person to tell you what that is.

• First thing you need to know...recruiters don't spend a long time looking at resumes. They just don't . I mean, they spend a lot of time looking at resumeS but not A resume. They usually start out with a keyword search of some type: in a resume database, an online tool, a search engine. They have their business qualifications in mind. And they look at each resume and do the yes/no/maybe thing. Big question marks on the resume are gonna get you a no, possibly a maybe under extreme circumstances. It's a sucky reality of the recruiting business; we have to spend our time pursuing the people that most closely match the position. Almost all of us got into this business because we like people. Or at least that is why we stay in this business. We WANT to help you, but in order to get people jobs, we have to work with the people that we can most likely place. And so my point is that a huge gap in employment doesn't make you the most likely candidate. So, your focus needs to be filling that gap. With something.
• Stay active. Duh. But I mean this in the professional sense: user or professional groups. Look, I know going to some of these things could make you want to punch yourself in the face. But just think, someone else in the room wants to punch themselves in the face too. And maybe they can hire you. OK, seriously, you never know who you will meet at those things. You can also do some non-profit work or something with your kids' school. You are making connections and filling the gap. We get it...we know what the economy is like. Just show us that you are doing something. Sheesh, while you were writing that business plan, you could have been filling the gap!
• Also, keep in mind that the person that is likely to take a chance on you (so same advice for career changers here) is someone that already knows you. Reach deep into those networks. Work for free if you have to. Do a lesser job than you could be doing. You are filling that gap. Filler up.
• And include it on the resume. Don't try to hide stuff with dates. Counter to what some would have you believe, recruiters are, by and large, a pretty smart group. So just include it. Address it in a professional sense, but don't go nuts. "Engaged in non-profit work while on hiatus", "Taking classes toward certification in <whatever>".
• Git yo self on LinkedIn. My little tip, that I have shared with many a job seeking friend (and let me tell you something, I know LinkedIn backwards and forwards...just ask) is to engage folks with less experience than you. Find them on LinkedIn, and ask if they will talk to you about how they got into that company. Don't make it all "I need a job so please help me". You are exploring career options. And that company came to your attention. This person with less experience is more likely to spare the time, they can at least give you some scoop on how to best get the attention of the right people. And they know about those more senior level jobs. Flatter them a little (just a little). See where that conversation goes.

I am sure I'll have more ideas to share with you.  And please feel free to ask questions. I've been there. I have TOTALLY been there (thanks economy of the early 90s!). I'll pop back as more things come to mind. Maybe a series of posts on using LinkedIn.

The best manicure of all time? Nyet.

(PS: the cover letter is a fake, but still adequately funny. And perhaps some good employment branding. If only the company wasn't named "Aviary"...kakaw!)