To start, I would make sure that your file share is able to be connected to. The easiest way to do that is to try and mount the file share to another computer. As many ISPs block port 445, it might be best to do this on an Azure VM. Here are instructions to mount an azure file share using a Windows VM, instructions for Linux can be found next to this article in the Table of Contents on the left.
For your configuration, I noticed that you do not have any MountOptions, you might want to try it with the mount options given in the doc example.
There is also a section in that article about diagnosing mount errors. If the nodes are in a failed state, you can pull the failure message to see what went wrong.