It is a bit mysterious that the games started having problems after the patch.
Maybe the patch did not install well and corrupted a file or files, but I'll carry
on with some general observations -
I do have have a little tool called 'Power Iso', which is just like Daemon tools,
I would uninstall this tool first, at least as a troubleshooting option.
PowerISO may not use the same driver as Daemon Tools or Alcolol but if
it does it can cause problems, and like may conflicts it may not affect all games/software. As with the Userva tweak it may not help in this instance, but it
is worth knowing about.
Zigzag has instructions for removing the driver in his post -
BSOD at high memory usage, fltmgr.sys - Windows 7 Forums
Tweaks like Userva - I don't know. A bit of fact mixed with urban mythology
that may not necessarily be applicable to BF3 ? An interesting tweak, and
maybe fun to play with, but...
The system RAM is probably not your problem as much as VRAM.
With 4GB system RAM it would be advisable to limit background processes
and not have any browsers open when playing BF3, but 4GB should be adequate. I have 8GB but don't think I've ever used more than about 46% of
that.
I would, however make sure that there is an adequate Page File. Some people suggest Page Files are a thing of the past, but I've read a few Read Me files with recent games that still suggest having a Page File .
How high you can push the settings and maintain stability does seem to vary from game to game, and if only one game is causing a problem I would be inclined to tweak some setting down.
With your system and BF3 you don't want to use Anti-Aliasing or HBAO for starters, but it would not hurt to tweak down a setting or two that use the cpu too, as both you cpu and gpu will struggle when too high settings are used.
There are a good number of people trying to squeeze too much out of their systems with this game (the Nvidia forums were full of people blaming the drivers for their problems ).
It may seem the system can handle certain settings, and you may even get playable fps, but this does not indicate that the settings will not catch up with the system.
As an example. I can play Crysis2 on Ultra with extra texture pack @1920x1080
on my machine ( AMD Phenom 965 @3.4GHz / GTX 560ti ). I get 35-45 fps
consistent , which to my eyes is a playable frame rate, but the game will lock-up
on occasion and I also had one TDR. When I lowered the resolution to 1680x1050 the frame rates jump to 45-55 FPS and there are no crashes.
The interesting observation here is that when I was getting 35-45fps the gpu
was almost topping out with peak usage of up to 99%. Little wonder there were
occasional lock-ups.
The VRAM is also stressed less with a lower resolution.
.