Sorry about your family.
Sounds like you have a reMarkable configuration problem.
First enter this command. It will test your Windows firewall to verify that it allows outbound ssh traffic.
ssh demo@test.rebex.net
You should get a response like this below. If you can't connect then you likely have a firewall problem.
C:\>ssh demo@test.rebex.net
The authenticity of host 'test.rebex.net (194.108.117.16)' can't be established.
ED25519 key fingerprint is SHA256:d7Te2DHmvBNSWJNBWik2KbDTjmWtYHe2bvXTMM9lVg4.
This key is not known by any other names
Are you sure you want to continue connecting (yes/no/[fingerprint])?
For network troubleshooting, I use a tool named Fing that I have installed on my Android phone. See https://www.fing.com/ They also have a Windows desktop version that you can try. When I connect my phone to my Wi-FI, Fing can see all devices on the network. My phones, my laptops, my TV boxes. It also reports on manufacturer.
Try either the phone or desktop version, and see if it discovers your reMarkable device. Then when you select the device in the "Manage this device" section, there is an option for "Find open ports". If it doesn't report that port 22 is open, then you need to ask this question in a reMarkable support forum and have them guide you in configuring that device to enable SSH.